#331

so let's talk about how some people ain't worth half a shit. [that was the most redundant sounding piece of shit. ever. but guess what; when i'm as pissed as i am, the ignorance will come out.] let's just say i have officially had my last birthday celebration. but i'll get back to that later.


so last night was the big night. the birthday party business. things got fucked up in all kids of ways:


1. my dress that arlene made wasn't made correctly. i might as well show the design now.



i tried to fix it multiple times, which i shouldn't have had to do, but it still wasn't wearable. the purple dress from roxanne's party was in the cleaners, so i ended up wearing the little black dress i bought from american apparel for shanice's baby shower.


2. typical naica, she waited until four hours before i wanted everyone to meet to go find an outfit. i was definitely dragged around the mall, starving and with a headache, for about an hour. i hate shopping with naica.


3. naica got locked out. so did her room mate. we tried everything to get the damn door open, from sticking hair pins in the key hole to trying to break one of the windows in the door with my oxford. her room mate is this old jamaican woman, [mad jamaican], and i swear, she called about a million people to tell the story of how she "never always lock dat door." long story short, we got some random man to kick the door in. quite amusing, might i add.


4. so i invited about twenty or so females and queens to go to dinner. about half of them have definitely proven to me how much i mean to them. sasha, bianca, ciara, and liseli just forgot, amy went to a party, and karla and brittany just didn't have the fucking courtesy to call and say they weren't coming, when not even twenty minutes before i left, they were "getting ready." mikey didn't get back from the hamptons with his family in time, so i'm definitely not upset with him. so at the end of it, it was down to naica and christina. naica's there every year for my birthday, and my darling christina is, literally, always there when i need her.

so i was venting to mikey, michael, and my mom and they were all very upset with these so called friends in my life. this shit hurt. seriously. i've been fighting back tears since last night, standing outside the restaurant. i let them all out today. it's such a fucking shame how i consider people friends. everyone's an acquaintance from now on. hi, bye, and that's it, because if you don't give half a shit about me, i won't care so much for you.

last night i was buzzed. bacardi apple and chardonnay. after that, all i needed was to lay next to my booskie and pass out, which i did. i put on my flats and walked from the restaurant in soho to the studio in time square, semi-inebriated, just to kill time, and i threw on my flannel, laid on the couch cushions, and i slept like a baby. today was spent eating dunkin donuts, mexican, and sushi and watching movies. today was really relaxed for the most part. all i needed was his company.

no class tomorrow, but i'm definitely going to school to do my physics homework. bed time . .