#466

i know, i know. i'm never around. for some reason, i have a life now? i've been working non-stop, finals are finally over, mike and i are doing good as an us, the fibromyalgia is at a point where i may be put on medication, and graduation is in four days. when things start to settle down, i'll officially be back in business..

#421

adidas meeting on wednesday. new jacks' introduction, new training teams, and i cut ass on danny's hair. amusing. i'm definitely getting more hours, and that's always a plus.

i took the bus with mommy this morning. she had me dying laughing on the street alone. her ass went flying down the block, running for a bus--that wasn't in service. i just had to sit there and laugh. of course, her being my mother, she had something slick to say.

bianca and ciara. when i say ride of ries, these bitches are my prime examples. friends for damn near sixteen years, when we wore those hideous burgundy uniforms at ebenezer elementary. we go back to the days before i was wearing palazzo jumpsuits with floral prints and denim vests to all the birthday parties. we definitely got into it tonight, but as all friendships should, we got past it. i rarely see these girls, but i have no idea what i'd do if i didn't have them in my life. we're all pretty busy [i think i'm the busiest], but girls night twice a month should do us well for another sixteen years.


so i have a boyfriend. the first serious boyfriend since robbie's faggot ass. michael. now people are definitely wondering where the fuck he came from, but believe it or not, he's definitely been around for a while. mid-october, maybe? right after naquan. he was definitely the under-dog in my cluster. after naquan, sidney came and left, and mike's still going strong. another one passed through, and that was short-lived because of mike--of course, he didn't know he shut that down. so yea, michael; we'll see how things go. i'm getting a good feeling about this one. we celebrated his brithday last night. calamari and drinks at that little mexican lounge on livingston street, followed by watching i love you, man, tipsy as shit. we tried this caribbean banana split type dish: platanos, ice cream, rice pudding, chocolate syrup, and nuts. somewhat nasty, somewhat not--all depending on what part you're eating it from. but it was fun. our first birthday together. we're cute. before my meeting at wednesday, he bought us red velvet cake and we cuddled on the couch and watched cartoons. i swear, i couldn't be happier.


another shot from the shoot with slinky:

i'm shooting with my wifey, nakeya, this weekend for her birthday exhibit--the dope girl project . i love this girl and her work is absolutely amazing. i'm excited, and i miss her so much.

spring break next week! girls gone wild? highly unlikely. i'm spending some time with mike, of course, but i'm mostly working. i changed my availability for that week. i definitely need that break from school. senioritis has definitely kicked in. i barely go to my physics class, and trig is the most confusing piece of shit in the world. i took my senior pictures, due to another arrangement with my mother: since i'm not going to graduation, i have to do the sitting. thornton studios did them; they did my high school pictures, too. i like their work, so i did it.

i'm starving. i have so much to do. i need to go to sleep, but i'm too busy watching CSI. i need to pick up the disc with the pictured from the marl garrison shoot, followed by tons of EcoEnvy shit. isn't it great to be me?

#373

randomness. yet again.

i threw down on seventeen gramatically correct pages of journalistic goodness on YSL and american apparel. those papers are due tuesday. i'm definitely prepared. i'm tired, but i'm wide awake. weird.

i've had this pic of lily allen saved for a minute. this is tempting me to chop my hait off again.

my little brother, jaime, turned twelve on tuesday. he's as tall as domi.i hooked up with them after stopping in midtown for a few minutes. during my rant to dom after a little altercation with a certain member of the male species that i'm not allowed to speak of because he's weird, jaime puts his two cents in: "...maybe he's just not that into you..." no wonder he's my little brother. we went looking for sneakers to fit his big ass feet last weekend after my shoot, but he's out of kids sizes now, and we weren't up for dropping $90 at damn foot locker, so the night ended at skylight diner. i enjoyed my last burger, because i'm officially back to my vegetarian ways. mommy fried mahi mahi for me today. and i ate so much dahl, you'd think i was indian.

stussy x hellz bellz!

i only want this tee:

i've meant to touch this topic for quite some time now, but never got around to it. my booskie, nakeya, got this sexy ass tat.

it says "The Essence of all things beautiful..." it's so simple, i love it.

friday night was the black people's show at columbia. it was hectic as hell, as all my shows are, but it was successful, none the less. i have six or seven more shows before june, with shoots here and there in between. i'm doing a shoot for a salon this weekend. friday morning's the hair prep. i'm getting a weave!

daddy's leaving on wednesday for barbados. he won't be back until june. shit. fuck. ugh.

happy birfday danny!

since i'm so damn wide awake, i need to go draw something . .

#331

so let's talk about how some people ain't worth half a shit. [that was the most redundant sounding piece of shit. ever. but guess what; when i'm as pissed as i am, the ignorance will come out.] let's just say i have officially had my last birthday celebration. but i'll get back to that later.


so last night was the big night. the birthday party business. things got fucked up in all kids of ways:


1. my dress that arlene made wasn't made correctly. i might as well show the design now.



i tried to fix it multiple times, which i shouldn't have had to do, but it still wasn't wearable. the purple dress from roxanne's party was in the cleaners, so i ended up wearing the little black dress i bought from american apparel for shanice's baby shower.


2. typical naica, she waited until four hours before i wanted everyone to meet to go find an outfit. i was definitely dragged around the mall, starving and with a headache, for about an hour. i hate shopping with naica.


3. naica got locked out. so did her room mate. we tried everything to get the damn door open, from sticking hair pins in the key hole to trying to break one of the windows in the door with my oxford. her room mate is this old jamaican woman, [mad jamaican], and i swear, she called about a million people to tell the story of how she "never always lock dat door." long story short, we got some random man to kick the door in. quite amusing, might i add.


4. so i invited about twenty or so females and queens to go to dinner. about half of them have definitely proven to me how much i mean to them. sasha, bianca, ciara, and liseli just forgot, amy went to a party, and karla and brittany just didn't have the fucking courtesy to call and say they weren't coming, when not even twenty minutes before i left, they were "getting ready." mikey didn't get back from the hamptons with his family in time, so i'm definitely not upset with him. so at the end of it, it was down to naica and christina. naica's there every year for my birthday, and my darling christina is, literally, always there when i need her.

so i was venting to mikey, michael, and my mom and they were all very upset with these so called friends in my life. this shit hurt. seriously. i've been fighting back tears since last night, standing outside the restaurant. i let them all out today. it's such a fucking shame how i consider people friends. everyone's an acquaintance from now on. hi, bye, and that's it, because if you don't give half a shit about me, i won't care so much for you.

last night i was buzzed. bacardi apple and chardonnay. after that, all i needed was to lay next to my booskie and pass out, which i did. i put on my flats and walked from the restaurant in soho to the studio in time square, semi-inebriated, just to kill time, and i threw on my flannel, laid on the couch cushions, and i slept like a baby. today was spent eating dunkin donuts, mexican, and sushi and watching movies. today was really relaxed for the most part. all i needed was his company.

no class tomorrow, but i'm definitely going to school to do my physics homework. bed time . .

#292

hAPPY biRfDAY sasha! [even though it was yesterday--oops]

so apparently, i'm condoning my little cousin's truancy. she has a tendency to call me at 8am to ask if she can come over, instead of taking her ass to school. and like an ass, i let her. she came over yesterday with her friend beyonka. i swear, if it was any other friend, i would've put her ass out. i don't like her friends. these little sixteen year old bitches get on my nerves. beyonka's just adorable. she braided my whole head in box braids as i fell asleep.

i'm exhausted. i don't know why i'm so tired lately. [no i'm not pregnant, so shut the fuck up]

model rehearsal for the eco envy show kicks off on monday. i can't wait to put these bitches to work.

classes start on tuesday. the schedule's nasty. tuesdays and thursdays will definitely be the worst days of the week for me:

principles of science lab 8-9:40 am [only on tuesdays]

textiles 10-11:40 am

fashion buying 2:30-3:45 pm

principles of science 4:30-5:45 pm

college algebra/trig 6-7:40 pm

*sidebar: i'm definitely not going to class on my birthday. fuck outt heree.

there's nothing much to blog about today, for my days have been pretty event-less.

new playlist. something completely different. enjoy =]

i leave you with this amazing pic. moments like this make me actually want to have a family.

#232

so merry christmas people.this may be a long one. i catch myself putting off entries for a few days. sorry.

thursday: mommy and daddy left. i was hella excited for a few seconds, but i miss them. spending christmas without them is slightly depressing. they left after 4am and i couldn't go back to sleep. i stayed up until 6am, watching a real chance at love. amusing, i must say. that afternoon, naica and i hit up room service--her treat. shrimp pad see eew is the most amazing thing in the world.naica found a hair in her rice. hilarious. then we went lingerie shopping, then grocery shopping. i cooked an amazing diner for naquan. we ate, i had a few glasses of cabernet, and had the most amazing night.

friday: we woke up, i made breakfast, then sent him off to work. housewife-ish? i shot with slinky at keith major's studio. freaking great. that's all i can say.

i did some shopping with naica and rano that night, then spent the rest of the night at home.

saturday: work, then the nippy lavern show at temptations. the most ghetto thing in the world. we'll have jokes for years.

sunday: i finally got my hair done! the poor little dominican lady shampooing my hair; oh how i felt her pain. i've never sat in that shampoo chair for so long. after that, i did some more shopping in the city, then met up with el to do even more shopping. dinner at silver spurs, then headed home. i got some shit together and headed to sasha's to study.

monday: more studying and i finally finished my supervision paper. sasha came over that night to finish hers.

tuesday: finals are done! that's all i have to say about that. i don't even want to think about the spring. i spent the night with my hunny--the only person i'd want to be with after a long ass semester.

wednesday: he bought my breakfast. pancakes and bacon and coffee--light and sweet. he went to his cousin's and i did some shopping--mainly for him. all marc jacobs: a black leather key loop, a leather snap bracelet with a metal place that reads "for you. forever" in latin, and a sleek black waller with a dollar in it, and on the dollar, i wrote "all i want for christmas is you." yes, i'm amazing, i know.

so today: parlaying with my hermanita. no parents, roxanne's pissing me off, and naquan's with his mother and her boyfriend. he hates it, and i was hoping to spend christmas with him, but being with him last night and seeing the look on his face when he got his gifts was more than i could've asked for. pics coming . .

#216

this is a quickie. i really need to get back to studying...

hAPPY biRfDAY miLLzie..


i painted my nails black. i've been doing the naked nails thing for some time for shoots, but the black is back.


emi sent me a few pics from the shoot. i swear i'd fuck myself if i could. they're amazing.



i finally heard that my president is black song at the AKA show. i know i'm late. i just never got around to downloading it. for as long as i can remember, there's been talk about mrs. michelle obama and her wardrobe. she's pretty damn fly for a first lady. the inaugural ball is about a month away, and every designer was in on it. someone put me on to these:

badgley mischka

diane von furstenberg

michael kors

nicole miller

peter som

tracey reese

chanel

betsey johnson

rodarte

marc jacobs

isaac mizrahi

christian lacroix

bonnie toung surely added some flare for little sasha and malia:

finals. shoot me.

• intro to art of africa on tuesday december 16th
• fashion merchandising planning and control on december 17th
• fashion merchandising on december 23rd
• principles of supervision on december 23rd

you'd think i'd be taking a vacation after all of this, but no. i have to work on my portfolio for pratt and sva, friday meetings for the eco envy show, shoots with slinky, el, and who ever else i book, and of course, work.

my parents are leaving on thursday; barbados for two weeks. happy anniversary to them. naquan's coming over that night--and only that night. thanks the fuck a lot, roxanne. my darling cousin decides to stay at my house this time, when every other time she's come up to new york, she's been at her mother's. fuckery. pure fuckery.

nippy lavern show at temptations on saturday. ghetto as hell? maybe, but it will be the most entertaining aspect of my life right about now. this is when the yo-yo diet starts.

back to studying...

#172

ok i'm back. i've been putting this off for eons. so much happened, i have no clue where to start. i'm about to seriously backtrack in no particular order.


midterms are done.


c - fashion merchandising and control
65 - fashion merchandising
68 - african art history

on my defense, these shits were hard as hell. for fashion merchandising, the highest grade was a 73. for african art history, professor wilson said everyone did poorly, but the essays were good. fashion merchandising and control, my calculations were completely off, since we weren't allowed to use a damn calculator. i'm waiting for one more grade. if i make it to class tomorrow, i'll get it.



a pic from the shoot with carl.





i'm shooting with patt thomas tomorrow afternoon. mikey's coming with me. this girl in class called us jack and karen. we definitely are. i heart him to pieces.


sick as always. it seems like it's always something with me, when it really is only one thing. millz said i need to stop using the word "flare" in reference to my fibro because it sounds like it's some crazy shit. that was hilarious. i miss her.



my dominique came home for a weekend! she met naquan, and she approves. yay! we went to stand [he paid for dinner before he had to meet his cousins] then we walked around union square, as usual.


halloween, my goodness. joan's face was blue and jason was lil' wayne with the painted face, drawn tattoos, and dreaded wig. nat's costume changed a million times, and by the time i got there, she was wearing gold panties? chris was supposed to be cat woman, but the country's in a recession. but i must say, the dasslers do go in.

zie's coming back to the east coast from holly-hood in a few weeks! i miss my little white chocolate cunt cake. she's been gone since march? april? something like that. she has a tattoo appointment: upside-down hearts on the back of her calves, so they're rightside-up when her legs are up in the air. my little fresh ass. i'm thinking about going with her. tattooing my ear? maybe?


thought: if you and a certain someone are "prospects" to one another, but to anyone on the outside looking in, you seem to be in a relationship, is that a just cause to proceed?

started planning dorian and clark's wedding. i have less than a year, and this is my first destination wedding. i also have to finish sasha's twenty first birthday party.

exhibit next weekend. super excited. mikey helped with my outfit =]

i love the poeple in my life. some of you guys, we only talk once in a blue, but i do appreciate your presence. muah . .

i don't have anything of much consequence to discuss, probably because i've procrastinated for so long. until next time . . .

#140

so i'm laying in bed after a long day of running around. a pointless trip to the doctor's office, a class that i was in for literally fifteen minutes because of the pointless trip to the doctor's office, going to work, only to get cut, but still be in the store to wait for naquan, who i called and rushed to get to soho four hours before he was originally supposed to get there. the economy's shot to hell. now these bastards want to fuck with my money.

i got a B on massa's quiz! go me!

i'll finish this tomorrow. headache kicking in.

#107

text-a-blog. haven't done one of these in a while.

i'm on the downtown d train and i'm tired like fuck. i spent some much needed time with music last night after work. red bull, smirnoff, turkey hot dogs, and the cosby show until i fell asleep--he fell asleep first. instead of laying in bed with him, i'm off to work, wearing the same clothes i wore yesterday: in true morning after fashion.

what i didn't know is there will be a halloween party at work, and a costume contest. i'm not up for the contest, so adding to the list of potential costumes: a cabaret dancer and a ballerina. cat woman's out--christina already claimed it. this is my first halloween dressing up and whatnot. having a pentecostal mother is never fun in cases like these. boogie said all of my previous costume ideas aren't original. this is true, but hey, c'est la vie.

little brat cousin's birthday was yesterday. happy belated chevon.

i'd love some pancakes and bacon right about now. pork bacon. music only eats turkey bacon, so i was stealing some off his plate, but it's not like the swine. i might just settle for a raisin bagel with cream cheese and jelly from m & o.

kay and i got over that fight [finally], i finally saw my best friend after how long, and dave the dj's back in the picture. well, to be back, you'd have to once be there. shit, he's around, leave it at that. he's leaving to go spin in europe for a month on thursday, so i intend on seeing him one of those days i have no class. yea, i have no class. for 3 days. go me. between now and thanksgiving, i'll have quite a few days off, and i'm not mad at all.

free crib in december! the parental units are getting a beach house for their anniversary and spending christmas in barbados. party? potentially. it seems to be the perfect opportunity for my black party, since we know i hate white. now, who can i get to dj...?

2:30. going over the bridge. left work early. i barely worked this week, but i just didn't feel like being there for much longer. i'm usually like that when i'm in a bad mood but today, i'm just glowing. my spirits are just too high to be trapped at adi-land.

my cory b. has a blog! coryBE.blogspot.com. i can't wait to go to dallas.

i've made up my mind. cabaret it is!

4:25. bonding with the bestie . . .

#102

my shift got cut, and class wasn't as much of a drag as it usually is. the afternoon was spent with my mikey. i got the baby name book from barnes and noble, and he helped me pick out my outfit for the baby shower from american apparel. of course, leave it up to a gay guy to pick out something fiercely simple. i did some cleaning, got started on some homework, caught up on my gossip girl and one tree hill, and had me a big bowl of trix.

i really do have this obsession with my curls.

the night's ending with me having a really uneasy feeling . . .

#82

the hat i bought a few weeks ago. i love it. turned a few heads. broke a few necks. felt quite fly, if i do say so myself.

so i got a write up yesterday. i was prepared to spill all the details, but i don't have the energy. music and i spoke about it for a while. he went into detail about the upper echelon of retail, and how being penalized the way i did was reasonable. i'm definitely not saying it wasn't. i guess i'm just a little upset.

i went home sick today. stress, malnourishment, and the sucky weather today just added to it. i really need to get on lyrica or cymbalta or something. so now i'm laying in bed, watching all mu cwtv shows. no homework tonight, since i did my assignment due tomorrow on the train this morning. gossip girls, 90210, and america's next top model will be keeping me company until music gets home from school.

weirdness. i just feel like laying here, singing at the top of my lungs, and crying.

so i ate half a chicken burrito from chipotle and a beef patty from golden crust today. i'm debating whether i need to eat again for the night. yesterday i ate four bags of chips, a cupcake, a bag of gummy bears, a bottle of nantucket lemonade, a yogurt, and a pack of twix. oh yea--gotta love my diet.

s and a? eh--s and c? maybe. i heart you sano . . .

#78

waiting for the 6 train at bleeker with no one but my wendy's fries causes me to text myself another blog.

i'm on my way uptown to help music. he moved into his spot yesterday, so we're spending the rest of the night unpacking and probably eating chinese food.

work was hectic for a sunday. corporate was in town because yamamoto's Y-3 show for fashion week was last night. we definitely has reason to be on point now. i wonder if the store made it's goal--i know i didn't make mine. making $2,203 is hard. i stopped trying after i did $1600+. i became more concerned with time, since i was hoping to get uptown and back home before 1am.

santogold's heavy in the system.

waiting for the 4 train. i just realized i might have been able to take that 5 train that passed a few minutes ago.

another 6 train. my eyes are burning. here comes a 4.

i started this half an hour ago. a fellow passenger on the 4 rain just complimented me on my juicy bracelet.

so i've come to face the harsh reality: tackiness is alive and well, and is spreading like wild fire. peep game: shorty has on a pair of cut-off shorts and a hot-ass-mess of a cut up halter, with some white sling-back sandals that are about a size too big for her. bleached hair, not too blonde, more of a honey-ish, beyonce color. she has a huge samurai dragon type tattoo on her arm, and as i suspected, she's with some [forgive me] niggerish type guy. and just when i thought it couldn't get any worst, there's a baby. well, at least she's reading a book.

so i definitely started this around 7pm. it's now 12:30am and i'm on my way home, tired beyond belief. definitely downing a red bull, but it's not really helping. i peeped the new apartment. i definitely love it.

amusing thought of the night: homeless people really stink. especially when they're soaked in their own urine to the point where there's footprints being tracked from car to car. it's hilarious how fast that car cleared out. i only see these people late at night. my question is: where do they go during the day?

red bull's kicking in. or maybe it was that man's stench. it's 12:39 and i'm at 103rd street. the 4 train runs local at this time, which is killing me.

i have a full day coming up. wake up, hair appointment, finish some reading while i'm under the dryer, run home to get my stuff for class, then get my fill in, which happens to be right by the bus stop, hopefully get to the library to look at this merchandising planning & control textbook, then massa's class, see music for a few minutes right after my class ends and his begins, then work, and then home.

68th street, hunter college. 12:46am. i really wish i had a wall or something to rest my head on, but it looks like there's a shit stain on the seat next to me--i'll never be that tired.

ha. so christina and i went on the mad hunt for the new YSL tote yesterday. needless to say, we copped.

just random thoughts. i don't think anything of much consequence is coming up.

12:51am. grand central. a white woman just got on and almost sat in the shit stain. i'm seriously chuckling on the inside. her rock & republic jeans would've been a mess.

1am. back at bleeker street.

1:15am. finally in brooklyn--borough hall--and i have to pee. took a power nap. some weird guy's sitting next to me and he keeps staring, as if he was trying to peep the blog. is he trying to get in on the movement? now he's tying to give me some black power, american bible business on this sheet of paper. i shut that down quick.

power nap.

1:25am. franklin avenue. i'll take the 2 train, then the bus or a cab, depending on how it's looking out there. i'm so sleepy, my eye can't fully open. it's not dry, the muscle's are just really tired. i can't even pace the platform properly. i seem inebriated.

ipod on shuffle. got that good erykah flowing. i keep breaking out uncontrollably. i need to get back on accutane. that's that crack.

some crazy jamaican just strolled up next to me, playing ring tones, singing along to the songs that need words like pussy and gangsta, and dancing in his white wing tip shoes. then there's a mexican, spitting like a damn camel.

i really do hope i'm not waiting forever for a 2 train like last weekend when i went to amy ruth's with music.

only a 10 minute wait. not that bad. the jamaican got on, too. fuck.

2:45am. at home, laptoppin' it. got in around 2:05, after i hopped in a cab at 1:59. my dude was whippin it. nighters.

#72

obscenely tired. i've gotten home after 9pm every night this week.

i'm sitting that the desktop, eating leftover mac and cheese for breakfast, and attempting to get some reading done for my african art history class, while my sister's in the living room, commenting on maury's guests in search to find their baby's father. i need to get my ass in the shower.

nothing much to say really. i guess i'm just not in the mood; too tired, maybe. adidas from 2:30 to 9:30 tonight, then 11am to 8pm tomorrow. i might have a full weekend, outside of work. estoy finito.

#58

finally off the phone with dustin after about four hours. i have my first class at 2:30, and work at 5pm. dustin's taking me to school [yay]. let's see how much coffee i'll be drinking . . .